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K, I created this blog just to be my douche bag. Dumped all the things that never been spoken. Or in other words, are hard to be spoken. Why? Dunno. Just not feel comfortable to saying my shits to someone #curcol lah istilahnya

But the funny facts are, my friends comment:

My 1^st pal, idealivin, he said that it was good if you sometimes feeling alone. “You don’t have to shared all the things, mostly when your proudly event but there’s no one you could shared with, you just enjoying them by yourself”. K agreed, can’t say any words because i’m already get used to it, get used to plunge this words into my mind

My another fellas, Amanda. Suddenly, in the middle of the night, she chat me, she said she was so curious about my blog, so she read it (since I’ve made a video about us, wanna see it too? Search “basbik movie” on the list ). Then when she finished, she told me that she can feel the loneliness of me. When I’m passed the crowd of Fatmawati road, seeing all the flash light, hearing all the shout, but deep inside, I am by myself. And she continued, she said “you must shared your feeling, no matter what it is. Even if it is hurt. if you hold it, you could sick”, I replied “ Thanks, but it’s okay, I can hold ‘em all, once again, thanks, for the attention, Man.” Sorry, but it was too late Man, I am already sick

Fracasado

i wish you the best :)

19

Yesterday, 11-04-2011 was my born day

Perayaan yang hening, no bash no birthday cake no friend, hanya dinginnya hembusan angin saat tengah malam di jalan Fatmawati. Sendiri. Bersama lembutnya nada knalpot vespa yang menderu. Bahkan bulan pun tersenyum pahit.

i close my eyes, flashback

when I was baby until now

what I have done, what I haven’t done, and what I must done

But BANG! I quickly opened my eyes

something happened

Actually, something was comes up.

Words.

Words are flying, filling my head. It makes me spinning.

It.. said..

Maybe this is your day, but it seems the world didn’t recognize, they all too busy with

their own business.

Maybe this is your proudly event, but they all too busy with their own stuff.

Maybe you want to share your best feeling, but they won’t to be disturbed

I’m..

I’m..

I’m..

a.l.o.n.e.

Gue pacu gas. Semakin kencang.

Melewati raga yang tertusuk dinginnya udara

Dan meninggalkan tanda putih, masa lalu.

Entah kenapa muncul emosi yang meletup-letup

Merenungi apa yang salah

Dan lalu..

Lepas

Menginjak rem dengan seksama

Berhenti.

Diam.

Sendiri…

Lampu kota yang redup semakin membuat tragis

Terlintas harus semakin cepat, namun tidak.

Lagi sepi gitu, muncul satu kesimpulan, kesimpulan yang adil.

Saat gue inget inget lagi, gue ketawa. Ketawa lepas malahan

Mereka ngga tau apa yang udah gue rasain, yang mereka lihat hanya senyum. Yang pastinya palsu.

Do not think you don’t have any of them, ‘cause your endless happiness awaits you at home.

Go, light up, cheer up, make them laugh, my son

Gue selah motor, putar balik, lalu pergi perlahan-lahan, menuju tempat yang gue sebut rumah.

Start -> my computer -> my music -> Sore - Centralismo -> Aku -> play

future

tonite. again. hang out w/ ma pals
joking around. make a fool with anyone.
and now. i realize
That everyone has their own life. maybe they're suffering but maybe they're happier than anyone else.
You can't disturb their happiness. you can't just comin' in without any alert and screw their life. need a step, a good step, so you can walk together.
so do i. i can't just step to her world when she was having fun with her friend
don't wanna . don't wanna make her feel disturbed
maybe there's a star in her eyes, and maybe i can see our future when i look into her.
but, ye know, we still got a long way down. so, i must take it easy
see you when i see you :)

easy

mungkin di post sebelumnya gue bilang "gotta take it seriously" and blablalba..

dan memang yang namanya berkata itu cheap ya. bahkan terlalu murah. udah menggebu-gebu dan hanya bisa berujung di pertemuan lidah dan bibir. ga keluar. susah. atau emang ga mau usaha? sulit dibedakan. Gini nih akibatnya udah terlalu jauh sama yang namanya dunia sepasang. sangat menikmati bergaul berkumul bersama teman, sahabat, kawan.

Atau sudah terlalu jauh dalam berlari? lari dari apa? entah lah. yang pasti mulai dan berakhir di kekosongan.

Another Blossom

after along time since i've been a stalker
can't get close to someone because my fuckin' condition, it shut me up
always end the nights in misery

And..... it's totally
OOVVVEERR!
i'm freely flying to another blossom
why? 'coz another women has drown my heart so deep inside her eyes
She's not like the others
She's just... feminime.
But with her feminine, she displays a polite sexy aura.
Even though my pals says she's not too beautiful
But i said " so what? she's prettier than any women in this world because the beauty is her"
Waideminet, did i said, she is a women? yeah. she is not a girl. she is a mature one
In the past, me and her has a complicated relation, but it's not stopping me to get closer

Uoh baby, i don't wanna lose you
don't wanna be just yer shadow
gotta step it up and make you mine
even though there's a long distance between us

gotta make it seriously
i'm not a kid anymore
i'm an adult, i'm a man

why so serious?
'cause i know this is not just an ordinary love
'cause i'm tired with playful relationship
this time, if God lemme be her Sun, i'll shine and brighten her life

cause.i.do.love.her

kosong

Three years straight feel nothing

They said it was unforgettable moment

But another stuff hit me fucking hard

out of play

Like somehow just don’t belong in there

Trying to scream out loud in silent

I’ve got no place to go

I’ve got no place to run

‘cause I’ve got no place called home

Chill but deep inside bleeding

With big face smile and stupid lie

Trying really hard to cover all of the pain with little laugh

You know what it is like?

To be tooked in all of your life

To be kicked even when you’re down

To be hurted but no one understand you

To be broke and there’s no one gonna save you

To be desperate lookin’ to everyone else runaway from your sight

To be crashed and burned in front of the crowd but have to keep smiling

When everyone lie straight to your face

When everyone stab you from your back

No you don’t know what it is like!

1 tahun kuda hitam

Boy, hari ini tepat 1 tahun hilangnya motor gue berjenis kelamin Supra X berwarna hitam dengan tanggal lahir 2004. mau tau gimana ceritanya bisa ilang? nih jadi waktu itu pas mau UAN, gua ngebentuk kerja kelompok, pas hari itu pas giliran di rumah gue

Kronologi Peristiwa:

Pagi hari: situasi tentram aman damai, sampai jam 8an gue ke Supermarket depan gang rumah. Nah saking buru-burunya mau beli minuman makanan etc, gue main ngibrit ke dalem, lupa kunci masih nyantel. Pas gue keluar.. ilang deh. Nah gue pulang, bilang ke bonyok dengan tampang plengo “yaah mah pah, motor ilang” JEDAARR dimarahin gua abis"an. Yowes lah gue telpon Bu tata biar ga dateng, eh ga diangkat

Siang hari: Gua muter-muter nyari motor keliling depok, and just for you know, gua keliling nyari motor sampe ke daerah perbatasan bogor, saking panik. Nah pas di perjalanan, si Bu Tata nelpon

Miss Tata: “dani dimana? Ibu udah nyampe depan rumah kamu, tapi kata orang rumah kamu lagi pergi”

JEDAARR lagi. lagi super duper panic nyari motor ditanya frontal, gelagapan gua.

Gue: “aduh map bu lagi dirumah sodara, abis ibu saya telpon ga dijawab-jawab”

Miss Tata: “ibu jauh jauh kesini ko ga les sih? Yaudah “.

Asal lo tau, rumahnya tuh di daerah tanah baru, sawangan, kalo gasalah. Jauh nyeet ahaha. Dan parahnya tuh guru ngambeknya ke Bebe bukan ke gua. Wakkak kena semprot lagi dari bebe.

Besoknya dikelas gua disindir dan JEDAARR nya lagi ketiga kali, dicuekin sama guru 2 minggu full.

Kampret

Yowes lah gue jelasin dari awal kejadian sampe abis, baru deh pada maafin.

But, at least saat gue cerita tentang bagaimana motor gue ilang, mereka semua percaya. Bahkan ada yang ketawa kenceng. Dikirain ngelawak kali ya.

Hmm..

gatau musti seneng mereka percaya dengan cerita konyol gue itu atau musti sedih karena mereka gatau apa yang sebenernya terjadi sama gue

mau tau gimana bentuknya kuda hitam supra?

tapi

Nih aslinya

Eish kuat juga meen buat bertiga..